Monday, August 18, 2008

Dating...Positives and Negatives

Courtesy of Margarita for a little briefing about our collaboration- "Elle and I were debating the ins and outs of dating in your 20s, or more specifically what are the pros and cons of being single, unattached females in two different metropolitan cities, Boston and New York. Discounting slight regional differences, men are the same everywhere. She took the con side (initially, I was indifferent to which side I argued but once I started to think about it, I found it was much easier to find negatives in the situation than positives), and I set out to prove why dating in your 20s is the funnest thing ever. There has to be reasons why we continually subject ourselves to awkward conversations with relative male strangers, because honestly, I really do love dating! The question is, Why?"

Ok...now here are my list of negatives:

  1. Awkward first date dinner interviews. I actually refuse to go to dinner on first dates for this exact reason. When I eat, I like to do so comfortably without the awkwardness of someone staring down my throat looking for a response to a completely asinine question that I thought was rhetorical. Not to mention the food in teeth situation which eliminates salads, veggies,etc. Girls also do stupid things like trying to squeeze into clothing that doesn't quite fit, so you really try to avoid anything with pasta, bread or anything carb related…hmm…what's left?
  2. Always having to wear semi respectable undergarment sets that match. Even though I've heard numerous times from men, that they couldn't care less about this; we women still feel the need to follow through with this tradition.
  3. Constant make up application…god forbid the person you're dating see you without mascara and lipgloss! The horror!
  4. Comfortable clothes are a taboo even though you're just sitting around your or his apt. You have to find something that's cute and casual even though you want to wear the scrubs that you kept from your old bf who was in med school and a big t-shirt you stole from your dad's closet.
  5. Avoiding topics that are worthwhile in hopes of not offending or scaring the person (i.e. politics, religion, your dysfunctional family stories).
  6. Sexual confusion…not orientation hopefully, but do you kiss him after the first date? Have sex after a month and if you do will he think you're easy? You have to time these things perfectly, almost like cooking a soufflĂ©. Take it out too early or late and it's ruined.
  7. Holiday gifts-always difficult when you just started dating someone. Should you get someone something for his birthday, even though you've only been dating him for like a month? I think a card should be sufficient but then when your birthday rolls around a few weeks later he gets you an actual gift. Now you feel embarrassed and like a complete cheap ass.
  8. Bodily function-enough said.
  9. Worrying about morning appearance. If you stay over, you have to think of things like morning breath, messed up hair, shower situation (do you take one there or go home), etc
  10. Walk of Shame…if you are just dating you probably don't have a drawer or stash of extra clothes over the guy's house. As such, you are forced to go outside the next morning wearing whatever party outfit you had on the prior night. Reminder to self…never do this on Halloween. Walking outside as a 25 year old whored-out girlscout wouldn't be a good look for anyone…
**OK...now go check our Margarita's side! http://www.smoresandmargaritas.blogspot.com/

6 comments:

Anonymous said...

As much as I do love boys, these are all valid facts...Another con would be the situation where you have a man who is very interested in you while all you want to do is bolt. Eek! Sucks major cojones.

A Margarita said...

Catchy is so eloquent, hehe.

I have to agree with all your points; they are definitely the flip side to dating. Sexual timing! Gah! A key element in courtship that requires constant vigilance. And I have terrible morning breath!

Hehehhehe, can we assume you were the whored out girl scout the day after Halloween? ;) That's hilarious.

Anonymous said...

You both have pretty good arguments going here. After reading your points though I have to say, kinda glad I never dated and just hooked up with my friends or co-workers. So much easier! You don't have to worry about the awkward questions or bathroom situations.

Elle said...

haha...hilarious. Friends and co-workers...definitely going to take a page out of your book claytonsgrrl haha.

Helly said...

Visiting via Margarita...loved both your perspectives. I am an Old Married Woman so I look at both sides with some nostalgia. I can say that some of my most awkward dating experiences were with the sweetheart I married. Had to stalk him for AGES before he asked me out, then he shied away when I tried to hug him, shied away the first time I tried to kiss him, and the bathroom thing? First time I went (#1) at his apartment I couldn't find the TP and had to yell for him - it wasn't on the spindle but on a shelf above/behind my head. AAAGH! But as embarrassed as I was, it was worse for him when (#2) he plugged up my toilet and had to ask me for a plunger (for serious). Got past all that, though, and got married!!! Love him bunches.

Elle said...

Aww Helly...thanks for visiting and I'm loving your encouraging stories. So funny and I think it's great that you ended up marrying the guy with all that stuff happening. Maybe girls really should just loosen up and let go a bit... :-/